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There’s
a lot wrong with the way
America
elects its presidents, but let’s begin with the
Iowa Carcasses. How’d a state that has more pork than
people (there’s a political joke here, but for the moment I’ll let it go)
get to have such a pigs-in-a-blanket influence in deciding who America’s
candidates for the highest office in the land will be? It seems corn-flaky
to me. But then Iowa has the great distinction of leading our nation in
corn production, and
Des Moines, the state capital, the more dubious distinction of
being the home to the insurance industry, but I won’t go there
now.
Iowa sits in
the
American heartland, thump-thump, and has a population
of fewer than three million. Only 2.1 percent of the residents call
themselves
African-American, which if
Barack Obama
were depending on the African-American vote, might make him nervous. Of
course, the voting history of Iowan’s is probably causing
Hillary Clinton
extreme-estrogen agitation. Iowa is only one of two states that has never
elected a woman to Federal office.
On the other
hand,
Mitt Romney
might enjoy the fact that
"The Mormon Trail"
passed through Iowa in 1846. Fellow
Republican
John “Mac-Hero” McCain could find inspiring the information that Iowa is
the birthplace of that other hero,
John Wayne, except Mr. Mac-Hero un-heroically pulled
out of the carcasses because he was afraid he couldn’t win.
Former
thespian
Fred Thompson, who is starting to look like a tall
William Frawley of Fred and Ethel fame (the
campaign trail seems to be taking its toll on old Fred)
might fare better if he shared former-Iowan William Frawley’s sense of
humor. But the guy is such a stiff on the campaign trail he’s already
become one of the
Iowa caucuses’ carcasses even before the vote. But with
an advisor like Mary-Mary-Quite-Contrary Matalin what can you expect?
Is Pretty Boy
Floyd from Iowa? I wish. There’s a joke there, bada-bing, in Pretty Boy
John Edwards.
But seriously,
the Iowa Caucus(es) is more than a century old. Certainly it’s seen its
influence ebb and flowchart over the years. But if you read the papers and
watch the talk shows these last few weeks, you’d think the coming January
3rd event is third in importance only to the
Second Coming. And it shouldn’t be. In fact, no single
primary should be singularly important.
The rural
State of Iowa might at one time have been a microcosm of America, but it
no longer is and yet the results of the caucus(es) are considered crucial
to the election of our
presidential candidates. For that matter the
New Hampshire primary is no longer representative of
America.
New Hampshire, like Iowa, is more rural than urban when
America is more urban than rural.
If we are to
keep the established
primary, system in tact, then
America needs to address where these early
primaries are held. Like it or not, the results of
these
votes do count and unfortunately influence. Honestly,
to make it fair, shouldn’t all primaries be held on the same day
nationwide? Too hard on the
candidates? Well, they are campaigning to become the
candidate to run for the highest office in the land.
Frankly, this
whole primary system is turning into the
political equivalent of “American Idol.”
We no longer mete out the best and the brightest based on the knowledge of
a candidate’s history and accomplishments therefore electing the most
qualified. Instead we elect candidates based on political acumen, and that
is hardly the same thing.
But back to
the caucus(es)…only 4% of Iowans participate in the event, hardly a
Bush-el of corn in the scheme of things. So, I wonder what the results
really mean. I’d like to ask Iowan George
Gallup, the inventor of the political poll, what he
thinks. But alas, he’s gone to that big
Ethanol-cornfield in the sky.
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