RED, WHITE 'N TRUE™
BARACK OBAMA,
THE INCH WHO STOLE CHRISTMAS
by HALLI CASSER-JAYNE
Posted, December 23, 2009, 12:01 p.m.

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Our snowflake of a president, Barack Obama, all David Axelrod design and little substance, got his present on Christmas Eve when the Senate voted to give him a holiday package neatly wrapped in lobbyist finery, the present inside alleged to be a health care reform package when the gift inside is nothing but a terrible fake.

President Obama took his victory sleigh ride caroling to all gullible Americans what an achievement for them the alleged health care reform package is, a T’was the Night Before Christmas fish-tale of a story leaving Americans with visions of sugar plums and dreams of real reform dancing in their heads.

On health care, on financial, on immigration, on pharmaceuticals, on Gitmo, on Global Warming, on jobs reform we will wait because Obama is the Inch Who Stole Christmas. Our president is an underachiever, a non-leader who will settle for an inch rather than go the extra green mistletoe mile for the citizens of America that he represents. To Obama life is not just a compromise; it’s a give an inch or two or three or five golden rings.

The truth is America now has a president who refuses to take a Christmas tree stand on anything. Obama can tell a story all right, or left or whichever spirit of Christmas moves him at the moment, or is to his personal advantage. Can’t he just deck the halls with tales of holly-jolly-you-know-what!

“Pooh-Pooh to the Whos!" Grinch was grinch-ish-ly humming. "They're finding out now that no Christmas is coming! They're just waking up! I know just what they'll do! Their mouths will hang open a minute or two. Then the Whos down in Who-ville will all cry Boo-Hoo!"

In Obama’s little town -- the one called Washington not Bethlehem -- all stopped being merry and bright a long time ago. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is no Santa Claus and Nancy Pelosi is surely not Mrs. Santa.

Jingle and Jangle aka Obama’s Chief-of-Staff Rahm Emanuel (O Come, O come Emanuel) and chief advisor David Axelrod, both pa rum pum pum Bums! have SLAY-belled their little rotten Democratic elves in Congress into buying the phony reform package even though the gift to the American people is missing an essential part: the public option once promised to compete with the naughty and not so nice insurance companies.

God rest you merry gentlemen, you do nothing but dismay. Of course, it is hard to turn down gold, frankincense and myrrh is it not, Mr. Ben Nelson (D-Nebraska)?

And what of Joseph Lieberman who hails from that land known as Connecticut? He has a higher calling than the rest of Congress…the insurance companies: on Hartford, on Aetna, on Signa on Blue Cross.

Or Santa baby, Bart Stupak and his Pitt of an Abortion Amendment, hurry down the chimney tonight!

Minority leaders Mitch McConnell and John Boehner away in the manger across the aisle; Do you hear what I hear? The Repugnicans are lacking a star, a star dancing in the night with a tail as big as a kite, but they sure do know how to fight. Sing: NO to the world, Obama Lord has come. Let us trick the King!

While admitting that the health care industry in this country is in shambles, the Repugnicans would rather obstruct than construct a bipartisan solution to a devastating aspect of American society. Just in case you didn’t hear what I hear, not one ~ not ONE Republican voted for reform.

Of course, they stood in the way of reform so that they wouldn’t have to vote for reform so that they can later say the bad reform package that they didn’t vote for was the Democrat's fault. And so that they can say that you’d better vote the Socialist Democrats out of Congress in the mid-terms because they are the bad guys, not us!

You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout I'm telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to town. He's making a list and checking it twice; gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Santa Claus is coming to town tra la la.

On December 24, 2009, Christmas Eve, the worst piece of legislation in years, The Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, passed. Notwithstanding the abhorrent tactics of the Democrack-Up Party and those of the I-have-no-shame-obstructionist-Repugnicans, bah humbug! the truth is that President Obama sang the glad tidings of the present of health care reform he has ordered up for his citizens this holiday season.

But the ‘present’ man is really the ‘present’ man. He took his bows and bragged that he got health care reform legislation passed when even Bill and Hillary Clinton couldn’t. He said this even though those who follow politics closely know that President Obama was anything but present during the debate. As he did in the Illinois Senate when he avoided choice and voted ‘present’ 130 times, never once during this whole health care debacle did he put himself on the line for the welfare of the American people.

In the end, the 60 Democrats who came around did not do so for their constituents but for their party (and themselves). With Jack Frost nipping at their noses, they were suckered into the bad deal by the reality that if the Dems didn’t pass the legislation, as the ruling party they were through, not to mention their questionable leader Barack Obama.

Then all the reindeer loved him as they shouted out with glee, Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, you'll go down in history!

The question remains, Present Obama, as what?

© 2008/2009 Halli Casser-Jayne. Reprints with permission.
An earlier version of this story can be read in Halli Casser-Jayne’s new book, A YEAR IN MY PAJAMAS WITH PRESIDENT OBAMA, The Politics of Strange Bedfellows.

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